by Kathy Ross
Editors, and especially those who are also teachers, tend to critique any communication they read or hear, including their own. I won't call it a compulsion or an obsession; it's just a way of life, a second nature-perhaps a first! Ask those who live with me.
Lately I've been critiquing my own prayers. By making some observations about my communications with God, I've learned something about myself. To state the case mercifully, I have some growing to do.
I've noticed in particular how much like my kids I am, at least with respect to magical thinking. They want to make the honor roll but skip the homework and tests. They want to be sports heroes without the rigorous training athletic prowess requires. They love Disneyland. So why can't we live there, or at least visit every day? I guess they're like most kids their age.
But how much more grown up am I? I must be more spiritual, anyway, because I ask God for my magic. I skip sleep and exercise and pray that I'll stay healthy. I ask God to help me arrive places on time, but I plan poorly and leave home late. I ask God to make me wise, but I give glancing attention to His word (unless, of course, I'm asked to teach it-then do I study intensely for a few days). These are just a few examples I feel safe enough to share. Others are more serious and personal.
One theme I've become especially aware of through listening to my prayers is this: I say I want to be spiritually vibrant, magnetically drawing others to Christ, but I also tend to ask God for a comfortable, trouble-free life. What's wrong with this picture? John 16:33 reminds me that trouble will always be part of my life in this world. And Romans 5:3-5 tells me how valuable trouble can be: "...Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us."
My prayers need some editing. I don't plan to ask for trouble and suffering. These things come without invitation. But I want to guard the way I pray in the face of both. I'm starting to catch myself as I ask God for easy outs. In such moments I have an opportunity to ask for something better, for perseverance and insight, leading to character and hope. Eventually, He will work the miracles of maturity and hope in me. Such miracles are mightier than magic. And they won't disappoint.